Skotah Gehat'ik: Kadas bal Mando'ad

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ForceJudgement
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Skotah Gehat'ik: Kadas bal Mando'ad

Unread post by ForceJudgement » 10 Aug 2020 01:48

Skotah gehat'ik ni ru'miit'gaana o'r gotan be fable'Aesop.
A short story I wrote in the style of Aesop's fables.

---

Sol'tuur, ad kemi jabat vhekadla yust, atiini ures skraan ra pirun, beskar'gam ra me'sen, shi miite or kaish kovid bal agol jabat kaish taabe.
One day, person walks on sandy path, enduring without food or water, armor or ship, only words inside their head and flesh on their feet.

Ven, sol'kadas ara'novo yust'ad. Epan'adas ny'oraryc. Ad iviin'yc haaranovo troan a'cuyoli vaii kaish ru'motir.
After, a tiger block path of the person. Stomach-need growls. Person quickly masks face but remains where they stood.

Kadas lalati edee bal sirbu, "Dinuir sol jorbe jor ni nu'vegyc eparavu gar."
Tiger licks teeth and says, "Give one reason why I not-should devour you."

Ad uresoni, "Gar nu'gana sol."
Person replies, "You not-have one."

Kadas ny'ora o'r kaden, a'su mun'kles'la, gyci eparavur sola ad ven'jii.
Tiger roared in anger, but still curious, decides to eat the lonely person later.

Tad'tsad norac'slana yust, tuu aruetii'kadas shev'ny'ora, "Tion'jor gar haaranovo troan? Ni nu'ven'aara gar."
The pair went-back the path, when the foreign tiger quietly growled, "Why you cover face? I no-will-hurt you."

Ad uresoni, "Gar skraan'linyc, bal copaani ner agol. Gar ven'epa ni. Bal ni nu'tengaana troan bah aruetii."
Person replied, "You hungry, and desire my flesh. You will eat me. And I not-show face to foreigners."

Kadas kebbu ashi tionas. "Tion'jor gar sola?"
Tiger tries another question. "Why you alone?"

Ad uresoni, "Ner aliit ru'cetar'tettar. Ni vencuyani sola."
The person replied, "My clan kicked-boots. I survive alone."

Kadas, jii mirdi'an jor haaranovo'troan, nuhuna. "Tion'jor baati ruug'yuste? Naasad ibik. Naasad'ash baati."
Tiger, now knowing why cover-face, laughs. "Why care about old ways? No one here. No one else cares."

Ad ori'beskari kar'ta, bal uresoni, "Jii gana naas a'ner niist. Ni ru'gora ti Mando'yuste. Naas ven'goy'yi kar'ta gotal be beskar."
The person hardens his heart, and replies, "Now have nothing but myself. I am forged in Mando-ways. Nothing can bend heart made of beskar."

Ven ad haal'nuhuna bal miit'akaani, "Tion'an gar copaani mirdir ruu epa ni?"
Then the person snickers and retorts, "Is that all you want to know before you eat me?"

Kadas nu'ret'uresoni.
Tiger no-could-reply.

Jii mirdi kadas nu'ret'piruni ibik ad, jiila abii bat bik bas, a'sa bik rusu bat ul'gaane, ad haaranovo o'r dha, nu'vey haa'taylir.
Now knows tiger no-could-melt this person, immediately jumps on its prey, but as it lands on paws, person hides in shadow, nowhere to see.

O'r sur'tenni'an dayc par bik skraan o'r dha, kadas nakar'mi ad slana nor'vaii, bal shukala sur'haaise.
In opening its eyes wide for its food in the darkness, tiger is unaware the man goes behind, and crushes (its) eyes.

Sa haai'kadas shukyc, balyc mirda. Bik ny'ora bal ny'ora bal orjore, akay trattok'o bat vhekadla yust bal mir'du.
As the tiger's eyes are destroyed, so too is its mind. It roars and roars and shouts, until falls on the sandy ground and faints.

Mando'ad troan'gaana, sur'tenni, bal duraani at kadas. Bat'gaani taldin teh cere bat adol'kadas.
The Mando'ad uncovers face, opens eyes, and looks down at the tiger. Rubs blood from fingers on the tiger's flesh.

Mando'ad haaranovo troan sol'ca'nara'shya, bal yaimpa at vhekadla yust.
The Mando'ad uncovers face, opens eyes, and looks down at the tiger. Rubs blood from fingers on the tiger's flesh.


Kar'ta be Mando'ad kandosii. Su ash'an trattok'o rud kaish, Mando'yuste ru'gora o'r pel'gam.
The heart of a Mando'ad is indomitable. Still all-else collapses around him, the Mando-ways are forged in skin.

---

Evaar'la miite ru'pirimmu:
New words used:

Epan'adas - hunger (stomach-need)

Lalati(r) - to lick (lalat - tongue)

tad'tsad - pair (two-group)

cetar'tettar - to kick out (boot-kick)

haai'kadas - predator's eyes (sur'haai - eyes)

sol'ca'nara'shya - one more time/once more (one-time-more)
Ib'tuur jatne tuur ash'ad nuhoy'ur.

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Cin Vhetin
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Re: Skotah Gehat'ik: Kadas bal Mando'ad

Unread post by Cin Vhetin » 10 Aug 2020 16:30

This is a very nice text you wrote there! I've noticed you use a lot of explicit pronouns (kaysh, gar, ni) in paces where it is already implied by context, so I feel like you could leave those out without trouble. In fact, in the way I interpret the grammar, I'd even leave out the "ti" and "be" - unless of course this is a stylistic choice. I'll admit, I am unaware of the Author you went for.

In the word "Dinuir", right near the top, where the Tiger first comes up, it seems like that should be an imperative as opposed to an infinitive, i.e. "Ke'dinuir" or "Ke'dinui".

Balyc, I couldn't help but notice the construction "sur'tenni'an". It's still a controversial topic, as far as I'm aware, but nice to see people actually using it in texts.
Tra'cyar mav!

Soraya
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Re: Skotah Gehat'ik: Kadas bal Mando'ad

Unread post by Soraya » 23 Sep 2020 09:51

I really liked this, Seya! I read Aesop's fables a lot as a kid, so this was a nice blast from the past, but with a Mando'a twist. I'm barely learning Mando'a myself, so I admit I only managed to pick up some of the pronouns, but I do agree with Cin - in some of the places, they aren't really needed, Mando'a being so fond of dropping explicit pronouns and all.

One other thing I did notice, on more of the cultural side - I found it very interesting that you chose to portray the protagonist traveller as an (essentially) exiled Mando'ad. To be "kicked out", as you put it, is something extremely harsh and feared by all Mandalorians, to be administered only in extreme cases of wrongdoing, and as far as I can tell serves as a sort of living death. It just struck me as odd that a darmanda was featured as a protagonist, given the cultural views. Perhaps a simple merc/bounty hunter between jobs, instead? There is a word for "between jobs" in the dictionary (if I'm remembering correctly) and may have a less severe connotation. Just a thought.

Edit: Also noticed that the translation provided for the second-to-last verse is the same as the one before it. All I was able to pick up was "Mandalorian", "home", and your addition of "once more/again", but it seemed enough to indicate that the verse was not a direct copy of the one before it, so there was a slight translation error (I'm asumming a copy-paste gone wrong, lol)
Shi haar solu'yc shaadla mav

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